


The Life and Times of the Berk & Burgess Railroad

by GrahminRadarin



Category: Brave (2012), How to Train Your Dragon (Movies), Rise of the Guardians (2012), Tangled (2010)
Genre: 1890s, Alternate Universe - Historical, Mild Language, More characters as I go, Toothless is a train, just bear with me here, why did i do this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-07
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:28:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23535289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrahminRadarin/pseuds/GrahminRadarin
Summary: Hiccup discovers three stowaways on his train one morning: two self professed hobos and an infamous felon. Somehow, Toothless convinces him to give them jobs on the train to protect them from the authorities and keep an eye on them. With their varied pasts all seeming to come together at the same time, Hiccup now has to deal with a quest for a lost lover, a criminal and folk legend on the run from mobs and the Bogeyman, a demon bear, and his own family issues, in addition to the business and Toothless. What could possibly happen next that doesn't make it worse?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	1. Not Just Another Tuesday

**Author's Note:**

> This idea came to me in the shower and I jotted it down. This is my first published fanfiction, so I need all the critique I can get! This is probably going to be bad at first, so just bear with me. I probably won't update all that often, but I will finish this. Someday.

Spring-Heeled Jack had been running for a while now. Almost forty years on and off, if you counted the stint in London, which of course he did. He was a master of the dramaticgetaway as a result. Having the wind as a friend helped immensely, but he wouldn't tell anyone that. This night, a cold one just outside a little town of Berk, should have been no different from all the others: give a good chase, but make it off in the end. Thank the Muses that it wasn't, and that I thus have this story for you.

To the small, angry mob on horseback, it looked like he flew onto the train from the cliff. At least one of them realized the reason for his stage name and mentally kicked himself for not doing so earlier.

None of them followed because contrary to popular belief, angry mobs are not that stupid, and none of them were named Spring-Heeled, were they? Spitelout emphatically cursed his luck and the luck of everyone present that a train happened by, as one does when the mob fails, and they began the slow retreat to the village.

Jackson Overland was quietly celebrating his latest escapade when he heard footsteps on the car roof. He turned, and froze. His breath hitched and he dropped his staff and his blood ran colder than it was. He had no idea what he was feeling.

Rapunzel had climbed onto the roof to clear the branch that had thumped on the roof as a favor to the unknown engineer, as she usually did. Instead, she found a man with snow white hair, skin pale as death, and ice blue eyes. 

Jack thought he realized what he was feeling: unbridled terror at being discovered. He was unsure of himself, for the first time he could ever remember.

Rapunzel stood up and drew a sap from her ankle holster, finally realizing why Eugene insisted she have one.

Before either of them could do or say something suitably dramatic, a fiery hair girl in a light oilcloth duster clambered up on the other side of the car.

"'Ow 'm I s'pposed ta sleep with all the noise from the train and youuuu…"

"Does anyone else want to ruin my day? No? I need to leave now, bye!"

Jack hit the roof with his crook, and Rapunzel slipped on ice she hadn't seen. For a second, he could run. For a second, he could control the situation. For a second, his world was right again. Then there were cuts on his cheek, the staff was splintered in half on the ground, and he was almost deaf from the ringing in his ears. In a time that he hadn't thought measurable, there was a gun in his back and an angry Scottish brogue saying, "Don't move, or I'll pump tha res' a them inta ya!"

Just another Tuesday. Sure, Bunny, sure.

***

The next morning, the weekly goods train pulled into Burgess. The porters were waiting. While they were unloading the third car, they discovered a first for the B&B: passengers. Most of them had somewhat low paygrades, and this was above any of theirs. An armed woman with fiery red hair yelling at them unintelligibly did not help. They called the engineer and business owner, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third, to take a look.

"Alright, what happened on my train last night?"

He sighed, wondering why he couldn't have one normal day.

"Who are all of you, anyways?"

The amazingly red-haired girl with a rifle spoke up, and Hiccup thought he was hearing a different language.

"'E's that guy from London, Spring-Bloody-Heeled Jack, and 'e was robbin' yer train las' nigh! I'm-"

"Robbing? I don't even know what's on this train, why-"

Cut off by Merida aggressively shoving him, Jack straightened up and glared at her.

"Tha's not important, you was running from a mob already!"

"Exactly! This was the getaway plan!"

Hiccup, knowing from experience with the twins that this was not going to end soon, turned to the third stowaway. She had almost floor length blond hair, and seemed scared of the other two, and people in general.

"They're not going to stop soon, are they?"

"I don't know. I just met them, and they're the only people I know aside from my mom and Eugene, so I don't know what they're like. I don't think they know either, because they just met too."

"You are…very talkative. So, what are the three of you doing on my railroad again?"

"You own this train?" she gasped.

"Uh, yes, I do. Again, why-"

Rapunzel almost squeed in delight as she realized she was talking to an engineer. Trains had been one of her dreams ever since she had seen smoke on the horizon.

"Ahh! I've been wanting to see trains my whole life and I finally got to ride one with Eugene and now I'm meeting the engineer and, and, and I don't know what to say! Can I please see the footboard? Please?"

Hiccup sputtered; she almost reminded him of Fishlegs finding a new locomotive.

"Ah, um, maybe you can meet him-her-it later-the engine, I mean. Now, for the last time what are you doing on my train?"

"Well, I'm here because I'm running away from my mother somewhere in Maryland, and because I'm looking for a guy named Eugene who is a really good friend of mine. He rides trains like this a lot, and he's been arrested before because of it, so I thought I could find him by riding trains like he does. I haven't found him yet, but I will. I don't know why those two are here, but you can ask them. All I know is that last night, I heard something land on the roof, and I climbed up to look..."

When Rapunzel had finished her story and Merida had had her gun confiscated after almost shooting Jack, Hiccup left the burlier porters as guards and went to uncouple the locomotive.

The sleek black fairing wasn't at all what he thought he would work with when he started his own railroad, but that was simply how it had happened. He had expected something smaller, and more mechanical. He was glad that it wasn't, otherwise he never would have made such a good friend. 

"What do you think, bud? Should I try to get Jack arrested? I've heard he was a bloodthirsty murderer, but he says all of that is the newspaper's fault. He just robbed people for fun, apparently. He seems like a good kid under all that. Maybe I could beat him into shape huh, bud? Use a little of that Haddock child rearing knowledge I learned from Dad?"

He was answered by an enthusiastic whistle and a small jolt that would have taken off his feet if he was standing, which surprised him.

"Toothless, are you serious? No, I am not protecting two hobos and an infamous felon from justice just because you like them, or because they're women. Alright, maybe the two of them, but not Jack. Do you want me to get arrested? How would we do that anyways, give them jobs here? Actually, that's not a bad idea. That could definitely work! I- Okay, Toothless, you got me this time, I'll do it. Don't you ever do this again, or I'm giving you anthracite for the week! There will be consequences!"

If Toothless could move his face, he would have a haughty smirk. Hiccup could almost see the fairing changing, much as he knew it couldn't. Toothless whistled and quietly rang the crossing bell in celebration.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merida and Rapunzel have a heartfelt talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry there's no continuity here. This will probably turn out to be a series of oneshots if I don't get off my lazy ass, so I'd like to apologize in advance. If this does somehow develop into a normal story, this chapter will be placed later. In the meantime, thanks for reading this crack.

Every time they went through these woods, Merida thought she saw something. No matter much she told herself the bear was a fairytale, she still sat on the back deck with her pride and joy, a Winchester M1895 in .30-06, lovingly polished and detailed, waiting for the bear. That was the only thing she had worried about for a while. She used to worry about her family, but they felt hundreds of miles away in Southern Virginia. Now, they wouldn't be a problem, both because they were so far away and because they were probably still grieving for her and her mother. Why? Why had she ever gotten them involved? Now all she had was the rifle and her fears. She heard a creak behind her, and almost shot Rapunzel. 

Rapunzel started, but didn't shriek as Merida had expected. Instead, she put her hand on the barrel and gently pushed it down. She looked like she was more startled than afraid. She tried to walk gingerly forward to sit with Merida, and was unceremoniously yanked off her feet when the train hit a curve in the track. Merida scoffed and pulled her up, wondering how Punzie, as Jack called her, hadn't gotten her legs yet. It had been weeks on the train.

"Thank you. Ah, why are you sitting out here with a gun? Are you hunting? I always wanted to try hunting, but I never had a gun, and I thought I wouldn't like to hurt animals. Oh, wait, you do this every time we go through here… Are you just looking at the woods? I love these woods, they don't look anything like the woods around my tower, but I love both of them. Nature is so beautiful, isn't it? It's not at all what my mom said it would be."

Merida, who up until now had been listening to be polite, said "A tower? You live in a tower? A medieval castle tower, made of stone, in the middle of the woods? Wha's wrong with all of ye? My current employer is an engineer with family issues and a prosthetic from a penny dreadful, a self confessed international felon who can't shut up and says e's friends with th' wind, and now a girl with ankle-length blonde hair and no social skills who grew up locked in a tower in the woods! Oh, let's not forget the magic train we're on righ' now! While we're talking about fantasy, why don't I just believe in the demon bear tha's hunting me an' killed me mum!

AAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGH!"

Merida was now staring off into the woods, as tense as she could possibly be. Rapunzel leaned over the railing in front of her to look at her face, and saw just how badly she was concealing her sadness.

"Merida? Are you alright?"

"No, I'm not bloody fuckin' alrigh', why'd ye even ask…"

Merida sank to the deck and cried. She hadn't cried since she ran away from the plantation, even when Elinor got killed by the same bear that had mauled her dad. She had stopped herself by not thinking about it, only worrying about where to go next, and… and avoiding the bear.

"Wait, did you say your mom is dead? Your mom is dead, oh no, um… what do I say? I don't know how to talk about this. My mom was mean, to me, and she never let me out of the tower, and she always said the world out there, I mean out here, was dangerous, and then she almost killed Eugene! I don't… didn't like her much, but she is still my mother, I think, so I have to like her a little, somewhere in me." Rapunzel stopped and pulled her hair behind her ear, blushing and looking at the ground.

In a soft voice, she said "Your mom was probably better than mine. I don't know what that relationship should be like, but your mom must have been nice. What was her name?"

Merida had started to wipe her tears away, and now she burst out crying again.

After another couple minutes, she answered.

"Nice? I guess she was nice. If anythin', she was too nice. Always worried about how to be a proper woman. Regular ol' American royalty, we were. She was always tryin' ta get me ta be proper, never a thought to how I wanted to live."

She had color in her cheeks now, she was starting to get angry again. Suddenly, it all died and she slumped to the crate again.

"Every day that I could, I'd take Angus out inta the fields and shoot targets and just be… free. I wanted to change my fate, but not like this."

Rapunzel sat and put her hand on Merida's shoulder.

They sat like that for hours.

***

The bear failed to build the resolve again today. Elinor simply couldn't bring herself to see her daughter like this, or explain how it happened.


End file.
